asongwithin: (Default)
Jean Grey-Summers ([personal profile] asongwithin) wrote2022-01-24 08:34 pm

Duplicity Inbox




Text / Audio / Video / Action / Psychic

notrosecolored: (30)

...I will never stop editing.

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-05 11:13 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Strange, isn't it? How talking can somehow be more intimate than telepathy. More of a... trust fall in a way.

Goes with being more work, probably.

The laughs nice, though and gets a smile out of him, lightens up what he says (and doesn't) some.]


Define normal....

[ He has doubts. ]

Actually, define back.
Edited 2022-02-05 23:24 (UTC)
notrosecolored: (Phoenix4)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-05 11:54 pm (UTC)(link)
[ He shifts his weight - folds one leg under him, turns toward her on the sofa to make it easier for her to touch him, and him to see her. Good position for him to idly twirl the ends of her hair around his fingers, too, while he reaches for words.]

There was...

I don't want it to sound like I'm making excuses. [ I take full responsibility. More appropriate here, though.] I don't think who you were reaching for was even there Jean. Not just the kids we were but the man who died.
notrosecolored: (30)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-06 12:12 am (UTC)(link)
[ He actively relaxes at the touch, all the way up to the edges of his glasses and even then he just sort of frowns in a 'what are you doing' mildly uncomfortable expression.

...One other person in existence who wouldn't get a really nasty response to that, and they're not in Duplicity. ]


I should have - and it should probably have been the end of our marriage. Or, I guess based on what the future seems to hold opened it. Which might have given us enough space to save it.

[ He doesn't sound... terribly upset, actually, which is saying something. In truth, he's not - about any of it. He loves her. He will always love her. He felt guilty as fuck about a lot of things involving Emma.

But he doesn't for one second regret her.

Hell, he has more regrets about things he didn't do - and Jean didn't do than what they did.

He is also pointedly, carefully, not thinking much about what came before that. Not beyond 'not the same'. It's been a long time. He will still lose his shit if that's pushed too hard. ]
notrosecolored: (30)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-06 12:38 am (UTC)(link)
I actually meant both of them - or neither of them.

[ But he's -- he's laughing, not at her but at the gentle tangle of fingers in her hair and that last statement, because. Just because it's funny in a very strange way. One he recognizes that he should need reassuring but on that... he just doesn't. He leans into her hand and tugs gently on the ends of her hair. ]

Probably not right now, but I know. [ Always, always, always. ] She was not happy about that for a while.

[ He loves her. He can't not. Then the laughter and smile fade. ]

I still haven't actually managed to say what I should have said years ago. [ And he still doesnt want to. So listen because he won't manage this twice. ]
Edited 2022-02-06 01:00 (UTC)
notrosecolored: (17)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-06 01:46 am (UTC)(link)
[ Emma and what he did there is complicated. Because it's one of those things that he doesn't like and really, really doesn't like himself for--

but can't really regret, either.

And it's really not where his mind is right now. Well, not where most of his mind is.]


At the time, it felt like I should have 'handled' Apocalypse like you did Phoenix. Like we both thought there should be some common ground in the loss of control and guilt to meet on. I couldn't find it and felt like I was failing because I could not just come back.

Having recently been given a basis for direct comparison - No, Jean. Even Dark, even terrifying and terrible, Phoenix is an elemental force. Apocalypse was evil. I wanted to die for what I did when I lost control of her, but I felt contaminated after Apocalypse and that was... I didn't handle that well. [ Could not stand the thought of her anywhere near him, really. ]
Edited 2022-02-06 01:59 (UTC)
notrosecolored: (28)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-06 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
[ There are points in his life when her tightening her hand like that would have turned him on. Now it just makes him refocus his attention on the present moment. ]


It reminds me of a few things, and to be frank it doesn't really matter beyond understanding what was happening with us and why and me making very clear to you that it was never a lack of love.

[ Shutting the conversation down? A little. Mostly because he will climb out of his skin if he emotionally focuses on that - or things it reminds him of - too hard. Fearless leader, get your head together, etc. Exceptions are made to make her understand and say what he's wanted to say to her, and only been able to say to a grave.

Think about Maddy too long and - Okay no that'd still be easier than anything with Apocalypse Everything (nearly) is easier than that. Some of the Phoenix and deaths... are harder. It's complicated. ]


And I'm not upset about you and Logan now.
Edited 2022-02-06 11:30 (UTC)
notrosecolored: (30)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-06 11:56 am (UTC)(link)
[ He gives a softly amused snort. ] In retrospect, about the time Logan and I started using you as some sort of weapon to hurt each other with. [ Can't do that if you don't at least acknowledge something was there. ] Consciously? Almost the second Logan told me what was going on when he was from. More so when I saw you.
notrosecolored: (28)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-06 12:28 pm (UTC)(link)
[ She saw some of -

Of course she did. ]


Keep pulling my hair, Jean, and you're going to get us arrested.

[ Also wry but in his case also dry. Not denying the idiots thing though because. Well. Look, he and Logan do what they do. It... doesn't not work at all? Kinda? ]
notrosecolored: (16)

[personal profile] notrosecolored 2022-02-06 12:43 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Scott... pulls her hair, instead. Look, he's got his fingers wrapped up in it and also--

He's laughing at the blush and question. It's just a really great combination.]


Probably. Do I think they have the staff and hours to monitor that much footage just in case? No.